I'm not talking about Journey ... she was FINE! She was eager to go and very happy that this day had finally arrived. It was me (Amy) who found it difficult. I know most other mom's experience this ... but honestly, it caught me off guard. I was happy and excited for her as we walked to the school together, felt a little anxiety as we got her situated at her desk (did we remember everything? was she ok with a regular backpack? would she feel different at not having a special 'kid' lunch box, would she be embarrassed that we hadn't gotten her indoor shoes yet? would the teacher remember to tell her everything she needed to know? would she feel at ease enough to ask to go to the bathroom? ) I was surprised when she didn't want any help taking off her coat, and lost as I said good-bye and walked out the door. Once in the hall it hit me fully and I dissolved into tears. Good thing Garron had come with us as I really needed to have him hold me for a few minutes and reassure me that our little girl was in God's hands and that she had us too for when things would get tough. She seemed so confident and yet at that moment my awareness of the dangers and harshness she would face throughout her schooling were foremost on my mind. I want so much to protect her from the bullying, misunderstandings, isolation, and ostracizing I know take place within the walls of learning. I want her to be free and confident and open to others. I want everyone to know how special she is, how quickly her tender little heart can be broken, how vulnerable she is even though she acts tough...I want to tell all the other kids to be friendly and encouraging and inclusive. But I am at home and for all this I must trust the One who made her and loves her more than I. Please, Lord, ... protect my child.
